Fondness & Admiration

Sigh....do you ever feel like sometimes you take one step forward and two GIANT steps back?  That's how this week was for us.  The last couple weeks were great and I felt like we were really learning.  I was really looking forward to this week, too.  And then something came up between us which escalated and, basically, we haven't spoken to each other in 24 hours.  Pretty sure that's not what I've been learning about in this class.  It's been a tough week, to say the least.
This week's reading in Dr. Gottman's book was, partially, about nurturing your fondness & admiration for each other.  He says that when a marriage is in trouble, as long as a couple can look back on their past with fondness, the marriage can be saved.  I think that's pretty cool.  And I'm happy to say that despite the anger and tears this week, the stuff that I read kept creeping into my mind and I was able to think fondly about my husband an my past together.  I'm grateful for that.  Dr. Gottman also says that the antidote for contempt is reminding yourself of your spouse's positive qualities.  Now that is something I should have worked harder on this week, despite our situation.
In Dr. Goddard's book, he talked about the power of faith in our Savior, and the effect that it has on our marriages.  I loved this chapter.  It went really well with the Gottman book, as it talked about focusing on the positive, replacing judgment and condemnation with compassion and love.  He said that we are "nobles who are on a journey Home to the King!"  Don't you love that?  In my religion class, we read D&C 42:22-23 which says that we must cleave unto our spouse and love them with all our hearts.  In our accompanying study manual it says, in regards to this scripture, "Only tow commandments i all the scriptures require us to love with all our heart.  We are commanded to love God with all our heart (see Deuteronomy 6:5; Matthew 22:37), and we are commanded to love our spouse with all our heart.  Think about that for a minute.  Doesn't that illustrate so beautifully the importance of marriage, and also how we should be treating or spouses?  Pres. Spencer W. Kimball said, "As we should have 'an eye single to the glory of God,' so should we have an eye, an ear, a heart single to the  marriage and the spouse and family."  He also said, "When the Lord says all thy heart, it allows for no sharing nor dividing nor depriving."  Love God and love your spouse with all your heart.  All of it.
As the week progressed, my husband and I were able to work through the situation that came up.  It's always so nice, so refreshing to get back to normal, to work through a problem and put it behind you.  I have enjoyed working on the assignments for class this week, looking for the bids that we make for each other's attention, and for ways that we turn towards each other.  And I look forward to continuing each day in this class as I/we learn how we can improve the most important relationship I've got, second only to the one I have with my Heavenly Father!